Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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