the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
