It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
