Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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