gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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