Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
