omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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