youre lurking in front of me
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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