Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
