Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
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Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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