And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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