I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
