u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
