We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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