Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
