This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Can you bring me the toilet please
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.