Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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