He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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