Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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