Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
