Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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