u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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