Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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