I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
