Sry I called you an 8
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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