From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize