The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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