If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
