If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
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Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
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I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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