I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Randomize
