margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
