I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I'm really into asian looking animals
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
