chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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