this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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