The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
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