i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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