Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
