the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
