After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize