they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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