Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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