why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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