I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize