break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize
