Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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