she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Drunk is a universal language darling
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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