Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
