FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
