I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
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On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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