how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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